A quick hello from Brussels, Belgium.

So i’m in my last week of basically a solid past month of travel, venturing through gorgeous London, freezing Edinburgh, enchanting Paris, waffle-tastic Brussels and after a short train trip this afternoon, five final nights in (adjective pending) Amsterdam.

So much to tell you! Sooner than soon. I promise.

xxx

At one time or another, every language student finds himself or herself at a precipice. A certain ‘coming of age’ point of no return, when all of a sudden there is a insatiable desire to seek that which lies far beyond the safe nest of grammar points and verb conjugation.

Follow the curiosity, and your command of the language can never again return to its same, innocent self.

This petite bowerbird flew from her nest very early, by ordering herself a copy of The Complete Merde (for the unflown, that is, The Complete Shit).

I might be a little ambivalent when it comes to perfecting my je fais, tu fais, il/elle fait and so on, but when it comes to this extracurricular shit, I pass with flying colours.

Who wouldn’t love a book that’s divided into the chapters such as:

• Common everyday musts
• The absolute musts
• What an idiot
• I don’t give a damn
• The body and its functions
• Weighty matters of love and sex – national obsession number 1
• The no less weighty matters of food and drink – national obsession number 2, and
• Merde Encore (that is, diagrams of French finger sticking and sign language)

So what’s in my new vocabulary?

• thingummyjig: un bidule
• to not understand a damn thing about: ne piger quedale à
• to be up shit creek: être dans la merde
• to take oneself very seriously: ne pas se prendre pour de la petite merde (lit. to not take oneself for small shit)
• to think highly of oneself: péter plus haut que son cul (lit. to fart higher than one’s arse)
• to be full of energy: péter le feu (lit. to fart fire)
• little twerp: un petit merdeux / une petite merdeuse (m/f)
• to have a screw loose: avoir une case de vide (lit. to have an empty compartment)
• love at first sight: le coup-de-foudre (lit. the bolt of lightning)
• out of sight, out of mind: loin des yeux, loin du coeur (lit. out of eyes, out of heart)
• fiddlesticks: taratata!
• uh oh/oh dear: oh là là là là!

x